I cant even find anything happy to talk about anymore. All my friends are gone to wherever amazing college they enrolled in, I have no love life and no chance at one either because of my non-existent self esteem and/or confidence and no job. You’re probably thinking “just make some new ones” But it took me a really long time to make the ones I had since I’m pretty shy and cant small talk for shit. I usually don’t talk if there’s nothing to say. My sister doesn’t even want to talk to me anymore because I only have sad non-exciting things to talk about. All I have is community college, not that there’s anything wrong with that, I happen to really like my classes and am just going there to minimize student debt but I cant help but feel like I’m missing out on some awesome rite of passages’. The only thing that really keeps me going is the fact that I’m only 18 and things are bound to go up from here.
I cry every night, sometimes for no other reason than just being really sad. I’m incredibly irritable, getting angry when ever anyone calls my name or am interrupted. I have no motivation for anything other than school work. I really just wish for a friend now.